I typed this post from the couch after weeks of my immune system starting to attack itself. I don’t say that for sympathy, but as a reminder of why this post is so important. A reminder for you and a huge reminder for myself! You must take care of your mom self or you will be unable to care for those that you love.

As a mom of four, I found myself never making time for myself. That realization actually led me to blogging. I would have people ask me, “what do you like to do?”. Every answer I could think of involved my family. My family is my life. As I reached the end of the year, burnt out at work and needing time for myself, I realized that I had to make me time.

As a mom, you are pulled in 500 different directions. It’s so easy to lose your sense of self along the way. You are so worried about everyone else that you don’t stop to worry about yourself. I’m sure a lot of you reading this can relate. When is the last time you stopped to ask yourself what YOU like to do, outside of your family?

Without getting too deep, I will say, we have to take care of ourselves. It took me many years to realize this and even now, I often forget. You can’t take care of others without taking care of yourself first. It’s not selfish, it’s not bad, and you have to do it to stay well.

Here are a few self-care things that I want to share and hopefully they can spark something for you on your journey.

Journal. Write it all down Momma.

You don’t have to be a writer or even enjoy writing. Journaling is truly getting things out of your head and allowing you space to work through life’s situations. Your brain is going 1,000 miles a minute and to write it all down is therapeutic. It’s taking care of your mental health. Write your feelings, lists, to dos, goals, and all the things that are floating around up there. You don’t even have to keep the journal entries. I mean you can burn them or delete them if you want. But I will say, I have journaled for many years now and sometimes it’s kind of nice to see how far I’ve come.

Pamper yourself. Splurge on the yummy smelling soap.

By this I mean, allow yourself to get the little things that are yours. I can’t tell you how many years I used baby wash as my soap. Not kidding. I now splurge and use Beautycounter (yup, that’s my plug). I wrote a whole post about why it’s special to me, and chemical free mommas, here.

But really, allow yourself to get the things that make you feel like a woman. It’s okay and you deserve it. So, whether it’s smell good soaps, fancy makeup, a fun handbag, or some new sexy heels (that you may wear once), treat yourself once in a while. You may still wear the mom bun every day but, on that one occasion when you get a date night, those red bottom heels will be waiting.

Block time for what YOU like to do.

I always said I didn’t have the time to do things and now I realize that I didn’t make the time. I forgot how much MY hobbies meant to me and let them slip away. It can be anything. Reading, writing, playing games, movies, time with friends, social media, knitting, etc. There are millions of them.

Block the time or schedule it and ask those around you to support you. Even the kids. Let them know that this is your time to do what you like to do. By doing this, you teach them it’s okay for everyone to make time for themselves and you get to have time to decompress. It doesn’t have to be hours and doesn’t have to be daily. Start out small.

Take a minute to have a mindful moment.

I can’t say enough about taking mindful moments. There are a zillion apps out there for this. It is proven that just taking a a couple minutes to be mindful and breathe can help reduce stress, calm the mind, and keep you grounded.

A good example of this is, eating your favorite food. Take one minute to be mindful of the smell, the texture, and how it makes you feel. It’s really that simple. When I’m overwhelmed, I take a minute to just stop, take in my surroundings, take long deep breaths, and tell myself I am okay.

Ask for help when you need it.

I still struggle with this one. My Virgo self likes to think that I can do it all and need to be in control at all times. It’s hard to ask for help but you have to do it. Whether it’s your partner, a parent, a family member, or a neighbor, ask for help when you need it. You are not super woman, and it really does take a village. Raising kids is NOT easy. So, take some stress off yourself and allow someone else to help you.

Lastly, just be kind to yourself. Know that many other moms feel the same way you do, and you are not ever alone. We are all in this thing together. Let’s hope that we raise a generation of caring loving people who will take care of our world.

With Love,

Kristy aka Mommy to Many